Love or Respect

If someone asks us to choose between love and respect then what will we choose?

This question had occupied my mind for more than a month. The reason to find the importance of this question lies in the goals of this blog ( The first goal of this blog is, “generate and have love, integrity, and prosperity.” Although, integrity along with dignity can produce respect but again is love that much important that we have to include it the goal.

To understand this, I decided to do research on my emotions and reasoning to find out the answer. For this research, I asked myself, “The reason for which, I decided to have goals.” The answer is clear. We need goals so that we have something to work on. This simple answer leads to another question, “Why we have to work.” Do you have an answer to this question? In my opinion, we have to work for two major reasons. First one is, “We have to work so that we can fulfill our desires.” The second reason is, “Our lives has meaning and importance.”

The goals of very elegantly satisfy both the reasons behind our daily works. Still, I don’t have the answer I seek. I need to know if I have to choose between love and respect which one is the better. This led me to dig deeper. Why I need meaning or importance and satisfy my desires? I think the answer is, “I want to be happy.” Therefore my previous question has taken a new form, i.e., to be happy, out of love and respect, which one is more important? You can give your opinion in the comment afterward?

Now, I have a simple question with no simple answer. If people don’t respect me, I will be sad, the same is true in the case of love. How can I choose between these two? They both are important. Why am I even pondering on this question? Oh! Because the great leaders whom we appreciate and who guide us in our day to day life through their philosophies have to make these choices at some point in their lives. I had no answer for this question for almost two weeks.

The answer came to me through the Indian Epic, MAHABHARATA. Bhisma said to Vidur, “If you choose to love, your life will be like the moon, cool but surrounded by darkness, if you choose respect, your life will be like the sun, bright and surrounded by light.” This statement had shown be the consequences which I will encounter depending on my chosen path but didn’t satisfy my curiosity. The sun has to burn all the time, and if someone is burning how he can be happy? So I decided to take help of my philosophy creator’s mindset.

While pondering the question and seeking the answer in creator’s mindset, and  it came to me that,

Happiness comes along with sadness

Love comes along with hate

Respect come along with disrespect

Wisdom comes along with foolishness, and

Knowledge comes along with ignorance.

In other words, until we have a desire for something we have to bear its counter with strength. The word ‘desire’ lead me to Buddha and he gave me the answer. What I concluded is, “Neither love nor respect is important. We have to practice compassion, and it will give us love as well as respect.” In the end, the goal of this blog is changed to, “generate and have compassion, integrity, and prosperity.”

This question is important because as we move ahead, we need to interact with many people and we have to choose whether we should treat them with love or with respect, or neither of it. Now I know that I have to treat them with compassion (not love or respect). What’s your opinion on this puzzle?

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